Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Question for you....

I am sort of slammed at work (and why I am posting this at 1:30am, I have no idea....), so I am reading your blogs, just may not have time to comment.

So the question for you...what do you do when your 4 year old (or 5 or 6 or 7 or whatever) tells you "No" when you tell them to go to their room?

21 comments:

my4kids said...

Beat them! hehe no not really....

I usually then walk them to their room and tell them that they don't tell me no and that that WILL go to their rooms when i say so.

Sorry your so busy.

Kelly M said...

WIsh I could help...I've got no advice for you...Hope your week gets better!! 1:30am...are you catching the "I can't sleep Syndrome"??

emily said...

I get down to Aubrey's level and I tell her immediately, "little girls can NOT talk to their mommies like that". I then take away TV for the rest of the day (her achilles hill) and I walk her to her room.

Not a lot of "punishment" works for Aubrey... she does great with positive reinforcement but every once in a while she pulls this and I have a zero tolerance policy... and she knows there are a few things where she gets ZERO warning:
1) Hitting/pulling toys away from friends/sisters
2)Saying "NO" to me
3) Standing on the furniture (safety issue)

She is allowed to nicely suggest another alternative, but not say 'no' for the sake of 'no'.

Aubrey is almost 3.5... GOOD LUCK!!

Kellie said...

I'm laughing at my4kids' comment :)

My nephew is 5 and when he's crossed a line and needs to go to his room for time out, he loves to pull the "no" card. My sister tells him he has two choices: he can go to his room for however long or he can lose tv or the priviledge to play a video game or he can't go out after dinner or the next day. He usually picks going to his room. She walks him in, sits him on the bed, gets down at his level and tells him WHY he's in there, etc.

Sorry you're so busy and even more sorry that you were up at 1:30 this morning!

Carrie Sue said...

Without saying a word, grab them by their arm and march them to their room, put them in there & shut the door. And even though it doesn't hurt them, it'll scare the business outta them.

Unless your child is possessed, then you should give them a "loud" talking to the whole way there.

Whatever you do, enforce what you just told them, don't let them have the upper hand {big mistake!}

ktjrdn said...

"When I tell you to do something, you do it. No arguing!"

Then I turn away as if it's a foregone conclusion that she's already on her way.

And if she still argues or doesn't go, I grab her arm and walk her to the room, sit her on the bed and tell her to stop bawling or she'll sit even longer (Because by that point, she's definitely crying loudly).

Someimtes it works better than others

Lil Mouse said...

I have to agree with everyone. letting them have the upper hand and defy you is no good. if they can't follow simple instructions now, how are they supposed to know to trust you and follow your lead when they are older. take their advice. now.

and if you let it slip yesterday, take away the tv, etc. for today and tell her its because of her refusal to go to her room yesterday. that way there's still some punishment. make sure its something she REALLY likes.

3XMom said...

pick them up, carry them to their room and shut the door, then sit outside.

Lost A Sock said...

I'm a big user of the suprised, "Excuse me?!" I don't do it on purpose, it just comes out. I've become my mother. Anyway, after that I either tell him to go again, or I escort him up there.

Now he's gotten past telling me no, and he's on to a severe case of whining when I tell him to go to his room. I'm not sure what's worse, haha.

Edie said...

Walk her to her room... show her you mean business. If she doesn't stay in her room when you leave, take something away... something she really really wants and loves... that'll be enough punishment for her to know you mean business.

You'll have to fill us in on the rest of the story... what's going on?

And, I hope you got some sleep...

Lori said...

I can tell you that as a teacher I was big on the "ummm I said ____" Another thing I said to the kids in my class a lot was direction given, direction followed!

EC said...

Personally, I say to him "Excuse me? What was that you said?" Usually he won't have the balls to say it again, but if he does I simply say "When I tell you to go to your room, you do it." Then he walks to his room.

Huh, after typing this, I guess I got it pretty easy!

That Chick Over There said...

I would physically pick them up, place them in their room, and shut the door.

sterlingirl said...

I'm not there yet, but I see it in my future.

Julie said...

were you in my house sunday night?! abby has started saying "no". I usually lay out a couple of options - go to your room for x time or no sticker on your reward chart (which she hates not getting)

common mom said...

My 7 year old son rarely says No to me . . . and if he does, I just say "Excuse me?" and I usually get a yes ma'am and he walks to his room.

My 5 year old daughter - a lot more of my personality - poor thing :-( If she says no, I get the same mommy "Excuse me?" out. 20% of the time, she says "Yes ma'am" and goes to her room. The other 80% of the time she throws an absolute fit, screams No at me, and on and on. I pick her up, kicking and screaming, and without a word carry her to her room and shut the door. She'll be in there FOREVER screaming and crying . . . I do not go in until she stops. She rarely tries to come out, but if she does, I just hold the door handle, which really makes her mad.

Ahhh - good times, good times :-)

RubiaLala said...

Not sure if you spank, but I'd give her the choice:

1) You can go to your room by yourself, or

2) I can carry you there myself and then you can get a spanking.

Pam said...

Sorry work is crazy! Don't sweat the not commenting....I just am glad you are reading! ;)

Sorry to hear about the Ashley problem.....my first reaction would be to either take their hand and walk them to the room or pick them up and take them to the room. But I guess you can't do that when they are 10 so I am not sure if there is a better solution.

SJ said...

I usually take Keven Jr. by the hand and walk with him to his room reminding him that he doesn't talk to me in that manner. Sometimes I give options too - either do this and you can have this, or don't do it and you get punished. I guess it just depends on my mood!

Sorry to hear that work has got you slammed. Sucky.

bermudabluez said...

All good comments....good luck!

Rachel said...

I beat mine.

Oh, you didn't mean what do I do, you meant, like what do people in general do?