Thursday, April 05, 2007

Sex Offenders

This past Sunday, one of my good friends, Adrienne, stopped by on her way to Myrtle Beach with her kids and sister-in-law. Adrienne and I have been friends for almost a decade and she has a daughter who is five weeks older than Ashley. We lived in the same neighborhood in Virginia (where we still own a house, anyone want to buy it??). Ashley and Grace were pretty inseperable, and leaving them was one of the hard parts of moving to North Carolina.

Anyways, Adrienne and Ray normally get into pretty heated discussions for fun. I would just sit on the sidelines and make sure no fists were thrown. For once, though, Adrienne and Ray agreed. Adrienne told us that a registered sex offender moved into a section of our old neighborhood and of course it was causing a big fuss. Her question to us - what would we do? Would be put signs in their yard and make sure everyone knew? Would we watch that person like a hawk?

Ray was pretty adamant, he would know exactly what this guy did and his whereabouts at all time. I don't know about sending flyers out about this guy, but definitely making everyone in the neighborhood aware is probably a good idea. Not to mention that guy living in that section just brought down home values. What do you think?

Go here to see if there are any sex offenders in your neighborhood...


Happy Working Mom said...

A good reason you're out...too bad for your house though.

I would definitely let everyone know. After that, I have no idea what I would do. Knowing me, I would probably try my hardest to move away. I'm pretty lucky right now...I have a school in my front yard, so I shouldn't have any moving in my neighborhood...registered at least :(

That Chick Over There said...

There are none on my street. One lives two streets over. :(

Brown Eyed Girl said...

This reminds me of the book "Little Children". One guy was obsessed with and nearly stalked the offender.

It consumed his life and was really quite sad to follow.

One moved not far from my Mom's residence and someone just put flyers on everyone's door for knowledge. Beyond that what else can you do?

Run them out of town....where would they EVENTUALLY live..the middle of the woods.

Move? No guarantee it wouldn't happen in the new neighborhood.

We can only do so much to protect our children from SO many things.

I have 7 in my town of 35,000. None are on my block..but that doesn't mean they couldn't snag Kyle walking home from school, walking home from a friend, etc. He's 14 and still not as strong as an adult but I can't lock him up forever ya know?

CPA Mom said...

There is one right down the street from me. We've known about it since I was pregnant with Eeyore. Remember I talked about it at Halloween?

You have to be careful of not breaking the law. Harassing him is against the law. It's hard not to do anything but Angie (Brown Eyed Girl) is right. Bad things could happened to our kids anywhere. You can be diligent, that is all. You don't want to do anything that lands YOUR butt in jail, that wouldn't help your kids any either!

Working Mom said...

I would make sure people were aware of this person, but like most people said, you got to be careful so you're not harrassing him. What scares me is the ones that might live nearby that aren't registered.

Bethany said...

I have one that lives two, yes just two houses away from me. We keep an eye on him. No one has put up flyers or anything but everyone knows.

Kind of scary. The girls know not to go to that house in an emergency.

Julie said...

There is one in my community but prob. 3 miles from our house - he's been there for years and best I can tell/heard hasn't caused any problems. There are quite a few located about 5 - 10 miles away. Just b/c they are not in my immediate neighborhood it doesn't mean I wouldn't come in contact with them. Other than being aware that they are out there, I'm not sure what else we can do? It all boils down to teaching your kids about strangers and the dangers associated with them.

Just to play devil's advocate (ie please don't slam me!), some of the offenders may have changed their lives/turned them around. That doesn't make what they did in past ok but maybe they (some, not all) deserve a fresh start. I would imagine for those people life is extremely difficult. We also don't know the circumstances (other than the information on that site) that had them arrested.

Great post - really made me think today!

Rachel said...

I go on that website often to check that no new offenders have moved in. I don't really know what I would do in that situation. Obviously I would, like Ray, watch the person like a hawk. And, I would definitely let others in the neighborhood know. And also, most states have laws that keep certain sex offenders from living within a certain distance of a school and things like that and if that was violated I would call authorities in a second!

If that violates some sex offender's privacy or something, I do not care! My kids safety is more important to me than your civil rights!!!

frannie said...

there are some weird things that people get registered for. This one guy got caught in a horrible traffic jam and eventually relieved himself and is now a registered sex offender. I would find out what he did. If he is actually a sex offender _especially of children- I would let the neighborhood know.

my cousin's new neighbor is a child molester and she has a little autistic boy. it is very scary.

Christine said...

Here in AZ, everyone is notified in the neighborhood by mail, by the Police Dept. when an offender is being released, and where they are living. It is very scary, I wouldn't keep an Eagle eye on him (I'd definetly report it if I saw him doing something suspicious), but I'd keep one on my children to know where they are.
I have one living right around the corner in some apartments behind our housing track. :(

my4kids said...

First of all that website scarred the crap out of me!
Second I have very strong feelings when it comes to sex offenders and would probably cause a big old rucus. I was raised to forgive but I'm sorry that (especially against a child) is something I have a really hard time with. I don't think I could stay where I was if I found out one lived very close to us. Just couldn't feel safe or comfortable with it.
My sil married one she insists he wouldn't do it again but he still blames the 11 year old he abused...I don't feel bad for the "difficulties" the offender has afterward I feel bad for the person who was abused, they have to live with it also and that is just something that stays with you.

Beccy said...

The watchdog web page is a great service to let you know who may be living in your area, we don't have anything like that here.

I agree with Frannie, find out what he did before making any decisions but your children are definitely your number one priority.

SJ said...

We have a registered sex offender that lives in the next neighborhood over from ours...I just make myself aware and keep up on any new developments, regardless of what I do, or what I know, anything could happen anywhere. It's just good to be educated and not ignore it. It's scary to think about for sure!!!!

Susan said...

It's also important to remember: Most sex offenses are perpetrated by people the victims know--either family members or friends. Sad, but true. So the creepy registered sex offender who lives in your 'hood may seem scary, but you REALLY have to be most vigilant about who you trust to be around your kids.

Susan at Working Moms Against Guilt

scribbit said...

Is there a way to find out what he did? Because I know in many states that someone can get put on the sex offender registry list for some things that may not be considered typical of what we think of (i.e relations with a minor, even if that minor is 17 and consenting). Not that that would make him an innocent victim but if the crime were along those lines it might relieve some of your concerns about your own children's safety.

Jippy said...

I was shocked to see two women listed in near by neighborhoods. One place had five of them living togeher and they were listed as continual abuse of ......... Some of them are force with fear and ......... When do they stay in prison forever?

If one lived on my street. I would make sure what he did. I also would get his car plates becasue they can get busted hanging by schools or parks. Every state is different so that sucks.

Some of them move to where the age of consent is very young, it's as young as 12 in some states. 14 in plenty and that seems young to me.

I am glad you posted this. I had been planning to move to an area that has serveral of them.

EC said...

I just found out I have one living literally in walking distance - very scary! I see him sitting on the porch every once in a while, and it still freaks me out!! Thankfully it is not in our division so for some reason that makes me feel a little better.